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 Jokes

A place to share jokes, funny stories, and to just laugh in general :-)



Please remember this board can be (and is) accessed by children.
All jokes should be family friendly.
No profanity
No jokes of a sexual nature

KEEP IT PG rated

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12. February 2019, 01:20:02
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: What do astronauts put on...
ketchuplover: I will hope the answer is funnier than a fart in a space suit.

15. October 2018, 03:08:06
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Purchase Database Registered,Ielts,Toefl,Toeic,Passports,ID,driverlicense
mandpoll950: I am missing the punchline to your joke. Perhaps you could explain it?

1. March 2010, 20:45:45
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Getting old is so much fun!
I don't mind getting old...

... it's the aging I don't like.

25. March 2009, 22:35:15
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: New Windows messages considered for Windows 7
Pedro Martínez:

WinErr 16547: LPT1 not found. Use backup. (PENCIL & PAPER.SYS)User Error: Replace user.

I went with a different system and keep it right next to the computer. It competes with the major computer and software companies and is very inexpensive. Works in ambient lighting without any external power supply. The only cost being initial purchase, though many places give them away for free.

Pen = WOD (Write Only Device)
and
Paper = NVSM (Non-Volatile Storage Medium)

24. December 2007, 06:00:51
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Groan
redfrog:
The original riddle: groan
The explanation : GROAN

10. July 2007, 03:58:37
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Why Why Why?
Skyking:
Something I've always wondered about is:

Why does a drive up ATM machine have Braille dots on the driver's side?

7. July 2007, 20:17:49
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Top ten ways to procrastinate
Thad: I was going to join the Procrastinator's Club, but I never got around to it. Apparently this qualifies me for membership. I might get in yet. Maybe tomorrow.

28. April 2007, 17:20:30
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Maxims for the Internet Age
Cheri: In light of maxim #9 I've reached over to my write-only device to record it onto the non-volatile storage medium that I use that I have to disagree with that one. And they continue to work even if the power is off.

24. October 2006, 19:57:22
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Joke of the Day!
teenangel: I looked it up. He's right, and so are you.

9. August 2006, 18:24:10
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re:
Jim Dandy: :)

1. May 2006, 15:22:05
Walter Montego 
Subject: Brain Drain game
Modified by Walter Montego (1. May 2006, 15:24:19)
http://www.imgag.com/product/full/ap/3067907/graphic1.swf

Having the volume on adds to the fun of interpretation. I did score an eight one time.

21. March 2006, 22:44:21
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re:
Floyd Krieger: Perhaps you'll see the humor of it when you no longer need to use the cane?

8. March 2006, 19:02:14
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re:
Summertop: I hadn't thought of that, but yeah you're right. :)

8. March 2006, 18:50:02
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Retirement 401Keg investment improvement
Walter Montego: I'm calling my local beer distributor right now! Interstingly enough I applied for a job there three weeks ago when my company went out of business. :) I do believe in the product.

8. March 2006, 18:46:12
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Retirement 401Keg investment improvement
Modified by Walter Montego (8. March 2006, 18:48:07)
Summertop: You got me thinking. If instead you bought keg beer instead of cans you might do better in the recycling market. Going price for a keg of domestic is around $75, plus you have to put a deposit on the kegs of about $20. $1000 will get you 13 kegs and $25 change back. After drinking all the beer you can get $260 for retunring the kegs. I realize for an initial investment of $1235 a return of $260 is only slightly better than your very good advice, but you can further increase the yield by having some friends come over and kick in some money for a few beers. Now you can party with your friends, drink a lot of beer, and maybe even turn a profit! :)

8. March 2006, 18:36:17
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Retirement
Summertop: Hear! Hear! And it goes quite well with my current job.

Sitting on the porch drinking cold beer with the neighbors.

21. December 2005, 18:04:28
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Snowmen
BIG BAD WOLF: Yep, thems some good ones. :)

12. October 2005, 08:15:07
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Re Feeling down
Lamby: It almost looks like his head is on fire with a gray flame! :)

11. October 2005, 23:50:32
Walter Montego 
Subject: Re: Re Feeling down
Lamby: Thaat is a good one! :) Perhaps you have one of Don King the boxing promoter? Or better yet, him shaking Donald's hand if they ever met?

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