Bernice: How are you receiving messages from him/her. In what form, I mean?

rod03801: games messages....I dont want to even talk the the useless idiot and yet I have to read his abuse and sexual suggestions....If he was built like Mel Gibson and had his money/ looks etc I might put up with it but he is an ugly, fat bugger LOL

he is on my "blocked users" list

Bernice: Hmm. That shouldn't happen. Seems like a strange bug? I don't get messages in games from someone I have on my blocked users list. I believe there used to be a work around where someone could send you game/fellowship/tournament invitations with messages even if they were blocked, but I believe Fencer fixed that one.

rod03801: this is during a game..........how can I retire from games with this idjit and not affect my BKR, or not actually give him a win in tournaments? by doing so?

Bernice: Do you also have him on your friends list? (if so, remove him)

Another thing to try - try to remove him from your blocked users list - and re-add him to see if that will help or not.

coan.net: I went to take him off "friends list" and on his profile all I get is to take him off my blocked user list :(

I have already taken him off and put him back on the blocked user list :(

Bernice: Try taking him off blocked users list, and then before you add him back on, then check his profile and there should be a link to remove him from your friends list then?

Czuch: I have done that so lets see what happens now.....thanks

Alanback why should anybody have to put up with crap they dont want/need.........

Bernice:Because the real problem is not the "crap", but your reaction to it.  If you can control your reaction, you don't have to worry about controlling events outside yourself.  The easiest way to avoid being bothered by other people's behavior is to realize that it's not about you, but about them. 

alanback: That is seriously flawed logic.
It is like saying that the emotions of shock and disgust most humans would experience when confronted with something despicable, e.g. child abuse, is our problem and not the abusers problem.

Furthermore, in an example of an advertised television programme which might cause offense, we can choose not to watch it. Bernice has no choice, but is rightly taking responsibility and control so that she may have a choice.

SL-Mark:Perhaps you misunderstand me.  No doubt a child abuser has a problem.  However, the shock and disgust to which you refer are entirely within the control of the viewer.  They serve no purpose other than to disturb the viewer's equanimity.

alanback: I do believe I understand what you mean, and to an extent would agree with you.
Excuse my extreme example below, as perhaps this was unfair.
Briefly, as this potentially interesting debate is best done off this board, the self conditioning that you imply, surely results in the de-sensitising of emotions and reactions. The very things that surely make us human and not machine.

SL-Mark: To some respect you are correct, to some you are not. Abuse is a cycle, passed down from abuser to abused, which unfortunately leaves scars. If you are the 1 in 8.. well..... but for those who are not, especially as adults.. it does become the abused persons problem, as they now have to sort out the scars or live with them for the rest of their lives. There is no guilt on the abused.. although some feel like it.

Anyway, this is a complex... realistically individual matter to each abused person. So.. no more.

Bernice:Try telling yourself that whatever is going on is his problem, not yours, and you needn't worry about or be bothered by it.