Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself "Lillian, you should have remained a virgin." -- Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter!)
I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: "No good in a bed, but fine against a wall." -- Eleanor Roosevelt
Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. -- Victor Borge
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. -- Mark Twain
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. -- Groucho Marx
My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. -- Jimmy Durante
I have never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back. -- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. -- Alex Levine
My business luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying. -- Rodney Dangerfield
Money can't buy you happiness .. But it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery. -- Spike Milligan
I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap. -- Bob Hope
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. -- W.C. Fields
We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. -- Will Rogers
Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you. -- Winston Churchill
Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty ... But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out. -- Phyllis Diller
By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere. -- Billy Crystal
(verstecken) Willst du an Bandbreite sparen um die Ladezeiten zu beschleunigen kannst du in den Einstellungen die Summe der Informationen auf einer Seite reduzieren. Versuche die Anzahl Spiele auf der Hauptseite und die Anzahl der Mitteilungen zu verändern. (pauloaguia) (zeige alle Tips)