VA_M.O.N.E.Y.: Lots of things have to be taken into account, firstly they might not even be on the site when you challenged them, also they might have a lot of games to play and yours will be delt to in the process of time. Stay cool lifes to short to speed it up.
ouspensky: Select the "stairs" option on left hand side down from main page select type of game you wish to play eg backgammon then select fast/ standard etc. hope this helps, also note you can only enter 1 stairs. Good luck