Sarah1980: another power ranger fan. awright. ha ha ha. power rangers with a walker. aside from the kids i wonder if anyone knows what that means. i dig those mystic rangers. mook

Sarah1980: thats a g. not bad either mook53lhd

Purple: thanks lets see what others said if anything. + the new jokes mook53lhd

Sarah1980: LMAO very good.

Top 10 Signs You Are Too Old to Be Trick or Treating

10. You get winded from knocking on the door.

10. You get winded knocking on the door

9. You have to have another kid chew the candy for you.

8. You ask for high fiber candy only.

7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, you lose your
balanceand fall over.

6. People say, "Great Keith Richards mask!" and you're not
wearing a mask.

5. When the door opens you yell, "Trick or..." and can't
remember the rest.

4. By the end of the night, you have a bag full of
restraining orders.

3. You have to carefully choose a costume that won't
dislodge your hairpiece.

2. You're the only Power Ranger in the neighborhood with a
walker.

1. You avoid going to houses where your ex-wives live.

JackS: You can't post a Thanksgiving joke until after Halloween. One holiday at a time!! ;-)

JackS: I remember the joke and I remember you taking it rather well when it got deleted! lol

Last year my Thanksgiving joke got run off PDQ.
Think it is time to post it over at Vtipy again.

crosseyed: I wasn't picking on you at all. There have been a few questionable jokes posted in the recent past, I was just trying to say that limits were being pushed. I didn't delete or modify the joke. I didn't even ask you to change it.

Thad: Ok thanks for that info.

My two cents:

I'd like to see this board stay super clean. It probaby makes things easier in the long run, BUT only if there is somewwhere to go with our dirty jokes. There is at least one place here. Join this fellowship:
Laugh it up, M8 (Vtipy od 18ti)

Problem solved.

mook53lhd: I have to say you confused me somewhat, one minute it was ok and then next I had over stepped the mark. I bet you some kids today could shock me even. You cannot keep them wrapped in cotton wool. They are more aware at 10yrs and younger than I was at 17yrs.

Rose: That joke was read out on a popular radio station in the UK, at a time when children where about. I think you people need to get real and see that there is far worse being said on TV and in films and just about everywhere.
I did not see any complains about the two old men joke.
It is clear to me that it is more who told the joke. Moderators need to learn to be less bias because you may not like someone. And I have noticed that some moderators have double standards.

mook53lhd: Rose was merely stating the policy. The Joke Board is for the whole family and children should not be excluded from reading it. Parents should be able to allow their kids to read it without pre-screening it..that's what the Mods are for. The egg joke reprsents the absolute upper limit of what we can tolerate. And it was a close call.

Rose: maybe children shouldn't have access to all msg boards . now we all know what the egg joke was really about. gving his all on the kitchen table. its still a funny joke & relatively clean. it wasn't censored .so how do you determine a g rating.? i think its easier to make jokes for adults only .if you really want some real jokes. i have plenty of jokes without a dirty word in them. but the subject matter might not be g . i wouldn't know. so i don't tell them. i think the kids should just be able to play the games. maybe have a message board for kids .they can make friends to play with .learn about other countries. i really don't think adults should be censored in this way. i agree jokes with %^*^%$ & rediculous or ?nable material shouldn't make the board. but that egg joke made it .there have been similar. but someone will post something & get chastised for it, not meaning to offend anyone. i think this policy of watch what you say on a joke board because kids are involved needs to be looked at. a joke needs to be told or delivered properly to be effective. if we have to change things around the joke might not even be funny. i've seen some of that. just an opinion. you say the kids the kids crosseyed. but if that 3 min egg joke can pass then just about any joke without profanity should pass. its clearly obvious what is being talked about in the egg joke. young children won't understand it .but kids 10 & up might to some extent. so really i see no set policy here. i think you're out of line crosseyes. you know you can use parental control. so wheres the beef. in closing i think explicit dirty jokes or profanity should be out . but thats about all. i will gladly accept any feedback. i like the board .i've seen some good stories & jokes. since theres no delay & your post goes right up there ,i mean noone reads it & says nope can't print that 1.i think so far so good . i appreciate your concern crosseyes but think its misplaced here so far, as in my estimation the jokes are ok since i've been reading them. mook53lhd

mook53lhd:Yes, I got the joke.  Thanks for the help.  Pgt and Tuesday, I thank you too.

King Reza: ever hear of 3 min eggs. ?well he was a 3 min guy . mook53lhd

crosseyed: Please read the top of the jokes board for guidelines

"(Please remember this board can be (and is) accessed by children. All jokes should be family friendly, thank you :o))"

All jokes should be totally family friendly even for small children who play here.

Please keep all jokes on a G rated format 
NOT PG or higher

tazman7474: Last one on list:
REMEMBER: This is suppose to be a fun game site, so some off-topic post and fun can be a good thing, so be careful not to over-moderate, and try not to nit-pick every post to find something wrong with it.

This is the joke board?

Tuesday: ...or perhaps she just wants to make sure her eggs get a good time.

tazman7474:OK.  No explanations! 

maybe we're getting just a little beyond what should be on this board?

crosseyed: I need explanation to understand it! 

She is in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast. He walks
in. She turns and says, "You've got to make love to me - this very
moment."

His eyes light up and he thinks, "This is my lucky day."

Not wanting to lose the moment, he embraces her and then gives it his
all on the kitchen table. Afterwards she says, "Thanks," and returns
to the stove.

More than a little puzzled, he asks, "What was that all about?"

She explains, "The egg timer's broken."

Fiona: thats a good 1 .especially with halloween coming. very good mook53lhd

King Reza: lol oh ok

Fiona:By English I was referring to the Language! 

King Reza: lol glad you liked it but it was sent to me by an American friend - so the Britts cant take credit for it unfortunately lol

Fiona: Thanks Fiona.  That was one of the few English jokes that have made me laugh.

TWO OLD MEN DECIDE THEY ARE CLOSE TO THEIR LAST DAYS AND DECIDE TO HAVE A LAST NIGHT ON THE TOWN. AFTER A FEW DRINKS, THEY END UP AT THE LOCAL BROTHEL.

THE MADAM TAKES ONE LOOK AT THE TWO OLD GEEZERS AND WHISPERS TO HER MANAGER, "GO UP TO THE FIRST TWO BEDROOMS AND PUT AN INFLATED DOLL IN EACH BED. THESE TWO ARE SO OLD AND DRUNK, I'M NOT WASTING TWO OF MY GIRLS ON THEM. THEY WON'T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE."

THE MANAGER DOES AS HE IS TOLD AND THE TWO OLD MEN GO UPSTAIRS AND TAKE CARE OF THEIR BUSINESS.

AS THEY ARE WALKING HOME THE FIRST MAN SAYS, "YOU KNOW, I THINK MY GIRL WAS DEAD!"

"DEAD?" SAYS HIS FRIEND, "WHY DO YOU SAY THAT?"

"WELL, SHE NEVER MOVED OR MADE A SOUND ALL THE TIME I WAS LOVING HER."

HIS FRIEND SAYS, "COULD BE WORSE I THINK MINE WAS A WITCH."

"A WITCH, WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU SAY THAT?"

"WELL, I WAS MAKING LOVE TO HER, KISSING HER ON THE NECK AND I GAVE HER A LITTLE BITE, THEN SHE FARTED AND FLEW OUT THE WINDOW

teenangel: I looked it up. He's right, and so are you.

Pedro Martínez: actually quiche is food

Obviously some don't know the weird sense of humour Glaswegians have and you can't put it past them in making such a comment. I work closely with a couple of ex Glaswegians.
Bono does a lot of great work (as well as Bob Geldof just to name 2) in making the power nations of this world do something productive in assisting those countries less fortunate. I'll leave it at that as this is not the board to discuss this any further. cheers.

Beren the 32nd: Quiché is a language spoken by native Guatemalans. The world would be better off if this guy was born as a Quiché native speaker.

BananaD: 1 for funny. purely being humorous. .it couldv'e been said differently for sure . say everytime you clap "someone in the world kicks the bucket from it.or a gentler way someone in the world contracts it mook53lhd

BananaD: Sorry but that isn't funny!

At a U2 concert in Glasgow, Bono asks the audience for some quiet.



Then in the silence, he starts to slowly clap his hands.



Holding the audience in total silence, he says into the microphone



"Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies."



A voice from near the front pierces the silence;



"Well, stop ******* doing it then."

Pedro Martínez: My brain hurts. Please clarify. I only found: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quich%C3%A9_%28disambiguation%29

Universal Eyes: If only he had a Quiché.

Fiona: Yes, I know, just being funny. ;-)

Thad: think about it - if all the men started clapping they must of let go of the rope to do that therefore falling off

Fiona: Then what happened?

11 PEOPLE ON A ROPE

Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten men and one woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one had to leave, otherwise they were all going to fall.

They were unable to decide who would let go, until the woman gave a very touching speech. She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because as a woman, she was used to giving up everything for her husband, her kids and for men in general, and was used to always making sacrifices with very little in return.

As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping.

An atheist was spending a quiet day fishing when suddenly his boat was attacked by the Loch Ness monster.
In one easy flip, the beast tossed him and his boat high into the air. Then it opened its mouth to swallow both.

As the man sailed head over heels, he cried out, "Oh, my God! Help me!"

At once, the ferocious attack scene froze in place, and as the atheist hung in mid-air, a booming voice came down from the clouds, "I thought you didn't believe in me!"

"Come on God, give me a break!!," the man pleaded. "Two minutes ago I didn't believe in the Loch Ness monster either!

pgt:So you are part of my company. before you speak!