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 Jokes

A place to share jokes, funny stories, and to just laugh in general :-)



Please remember this board can be (and is) accessed by children.
All jokes should be family friendly.
No profanity
No jokes of a sexual nature

KEEP IT PG rated

Thanks!



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7. March 2008, 03:53:38
rednaz23 
Subject: Re:
Sarah1980: Now that's fast-food! :-)

24. January 2007, 18:59:56
rednaz23 
Subject: Re:
King Reza: 1 gross is a dozen dozen, or 12 x 12 = 144...

Fowl is another word for birds like ducks... essentially water birds are fowl. which is said the same way as foul.

Does that make sense?

18. July 2006, 03:10:23
rednaz23 
Subject: dang roommates...
10) Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, "He just didn't belong."

9) Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.
8) Draw a tiny black line on your nose. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, "The hair, it's growing. Growing!"

7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon...."

6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

5) Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich!?" Complain loudly that you are hungry.

2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"

1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."

30. June 2006, 02:55:41
rednaz23 
Subject: Re:
Sarah1980: You know he may have started it, but you didn't have to do anything in return... To take a well known quote and change it a bit... "Only the foolish will follow a fool."

29. June 2006, 04:50:28
rednaz23 
Subject: Re:
Sarah1980 and mook53lhd: orange and green zebras... blah!!! Let's not blow anything up...

17. May 2006, 10:51:35
rednaz23 
Subject: Great Video
This really isn't a joke. It is just plain hilarious! This guy gets what he deserves...

Here is the link: Rich man vs. Old woman

Phil (rednaz23)

16. May 2006, 06:03:45
rednaz23 
Subject: Pikachu
Pikachu is sitting at a bus stop. The bus comes, and Pikachu walks to the bus door but won't get on! what do you do?



Pokemon!

15. May 2006, 07:41:51
rednaz23 
Subject: Bad Jokes
Are there any fellowships that have a "bad jokes" board? I don't mean a joke that is not a good joke, I mean; "I can't believe that was just said"... a place to post posts that would get blocked or cause me to be hidden on this board. Anyone?

4. May 2006, 01:40:06
rednaz23 
LOL... oops... I wrote this to the wrong board!

4. May 2006, 01:39:33
rednaz23 
Subject: Black Rook on Wednesday
I know its Wednesday!
spaghetti I cook
I will really pay
I want a black rook

I want this so bad
I bet you do too
I will be so glad
When it goes through

I have lots to do
I better get going
I say this I do
'fore I get boring

1. May 2006, 09:32:45
rednaz23 
Subject: random things I remembered or made up...
If con is the opposite of pro.
What's the opposite of Congress?

**Interesting!

----

A man is at a bus stop, Pikachu is in front of him and won't get on the bus. What does he do?

Poke-him-on! (Pokemon)

**I heard this today at a big conference... Not many understood it!

----

Two men walk into a bar. What did the third do?

Duck!

**Thank my GF for that one!

----

What do you call a man with no legs, no arms, and trying to swim?

Bob

**I heard this on Spring Break!

----

What do you call a woman with only one leg?

Ilene

**I heard this on Spring Break!

----

Where did the lioness keep her zebra legs?

You'll never find out, shes a lion!

**I made this one up. What do you think?

20. April 2006, 06:19:16
rednaz23 
Subject: Re: just Humour
skipinnz: That joke is funny... but true. A long time ago, the Vatican added fish as acceptable food to eat during Lent... during that time, the Pope's family owned a large fishing fleet. Go figure... politics even in religion!

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