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 Jokes

A place to share jokes, funny stories, and to just laugh in general :-)



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12. April 2005, 01:05:31
chupacabraVS2 
Subject: drunk jokes
2 drunks were sitting in the afternoon on a park bench sharing a bottle in front of the lion's cage at the zoo.they both fell asleep.6:00 PM ,its feeding time at the zoo,the lion wakes up & roars.both drunks wake up startled & stiil snonckered."come on,et's get out of here".one druk says to the other.hid friend says."no,no,wait,the movie just started".
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drunk staggers up onto the the 1st steop at the old city hall.drops a dime into a crevass in the mortar,looks up at the clockface on the clocktower & mumbles to himself"geez,I lost 5 pounds".
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A large woman, wearing a sleeveless sun dress, walked into a bar in London. She raised her right arm, revealing a huge, hairy armpit as she pointed to all the people sitting at the bar and asked, “What man here will buy a lady a drink?”
The bar went silent as the patrons tried to ignore her. But down at the end of the bar, an owly-eyed drunk slammed his hand down on the counter and bellowed, “Give the ballerina a drink!”

The bartender poured the drink and the woman chugged it down. She turned to the patrons and again pointed around at all of them, revealing the same hairy armpit, and asked, “What man here will buy a lady a drink?” Once again, the same little drunk slapped his money down on the bar and said, “Give the ballerina another drink!”

The bartender approached the little drunk and said, “I say, old chap, it’s your business if you want to buy the lady a drink, but why do you keep calling her the ballerina?’”

“As far as I’m concerned”, the drunk replied, “any woman who can lift her leg that high has got to be a ballerina!”

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